The Evening News

Hear ye! Hear ye! Here is the evening news!

The Soweiter League wants to give thanks to our brave militia who recently defended Offenbach from foreign invasion. Pictured here is one of the brave lads, who had to return to town for musket repair. The rest of the militia are currently residing in the land of M'Wockie.In other news:

scene: marketplace -

Diminutive figure spotted running from the scene of an altercation, silver pig tucked under one arm

local 1: "Was that the piper's son?"

local: "Tom-Tom? Looked like him, but the clothes look odd and does he have five-o-clock shadow?"

Scene 2

Later, in the backrooms of a royal palace somewhere in eastern or central Urope -

dim. figure: "Da, I haf brought it, ze zilver pik."

Boris the Boar, King of Bossanova: "Ekzellent, Vizzini! And no one zuzpected anyzing?"

dim. figure: "Nein, I am, as zey say, ze master uf dizguize."

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Foreign troops spotted in the area around Offenbach by local farmers. From the pale uniforms with yellow facings it appears these are members of the 2nd Battalion of the Batrachian Observation army. Members of the 1st Battalion were spotted previously in the same area.

Local Farmers Spot Foreign Troops

1st farmer: "Yup, they wuz furriners. Talked all funny like."

2nd farmer: "Ja, dat is correkt. And dey wore white uniforms."

3rd farmer: "Zees ees treu."

1st farmer: "They said they wuz just looking. Maybe they wuz tourists."

2nd farmer: "Ve told dem you can't get dere from hier. ha ha"

3rd farmer: "Hi, mom."

Farmer's wife: "Hay."

This edition of the evening news has been brought to you by the Dairy Farmer's Association KUHE. "Gott milch?"